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DOOGLES!
Doogles...
level 30 primary/secondary arms

instinct 350
vitality 100
speed 200


SCOOUTS!
Scoouts...
level 30 2-handed arms

instinct 700
vitality 200
speed 400





aaah, the old Doogles and Scoouts (deagles and scouts)

diamond-encrusted pipe
level 30 two-handed arms
strength+763
vitality+349
speed+229
because platinum is, like, sooooo one-handed arms

Plasma Coated Titanium Cored Diamond Accursed Pipe of the Apocolypse
level 50 two handed arms
Bonuses: Speed+500
Strength+1300
Instinct+1000
Vitality+800
Focus+200
Because everything else is soo, like weak

Now that that is over, maybe we can actually get on with the spirit of the thread...

Branch
Level 100 Secondary Arms
+450 Speed
+150 Strength
+25 Instinct
+375 Vitality
+1000 Earth Piercing
+100 Physical Piercing

No, we don't know what happened to it...

Worthless weapon
level 31 three-handed legs.
+ 9,999,999,999 damage to all of your spells that use cosmic piercing
+ 9,999,999,999 damage to all of your spells that use earth piercing
+ 9,999,999,999 charisma, which should be in the game but is not
+ 9,999,999,999 skill points, which can only be used on a skill that has 9,999,999,999 levels. Sadly none exist.
Worth 2 pence.
How does this help you...? Maybe it is a metaphor? Yeah, that is it!

A joke on how everything in the whole game is a metaphor, seemingly.

Red Ring of Death
GET AWAY FROM THE USER!
Level 30 All slots.

All piercings + 999
Speed + 200

Bat
Level 27 Two-Handed "Sword"
The classic Zombie killer, they've used it on you, now you can use it on them.

Strength +250
Physical Piercing +250
Vitality +30
This weapon has a chance to give the enemy big red welts, if this happens they lose 5 focus per turn, per welt.

Mirror Shield
Level 30 Secondary Arms
Ooh, shiny!

This shield reflects enemy's attack back at them.

Banana Gun
Level 25 Primary Arms
Mwahaha! I kill you with banana!

Speed +125
Intinct +245
Vitality +75

Banana Pistol
Level 25 Secondary Arms
Don't eat it!

Speed +200
Intinct +100
Vitality +50

Radioactive pipe of DOOM!!!!!!!! LV.50 PRIMARY ARMS!
deals out 1,000,000 damage!!!!I BEAT YOUR BANANA GUN!!!!!!

[b]Phoenix Sword
Level 30 Two-Handed Arms
+200 Strength
+125 Speed
+500% Fire Piercing

When you combine the sword of Galiant the Paladin and a feather of a Phoenix u get this...

[b] Blazing Boomerang
Lvl 30 Secondary Weapon
x50 Strength
x50 Speed
Makes Vitality 1 Item adds won't be removed
Physical Piercing +10000

Hot!Hot!Hot!
Kill the enemy in one shot or ur finished hehehe!

nice, you guys just shot down the pipe...
it is meant to be 1 handed...

Holey Broken Pipe
level 3 Primary Arms
Bonuses: Strength+5
Why is there a bullet hole in it?


No, we shot through it...