I gave these poems to my english teacher for a poetry folio we had to do and got a 100percent. I dont think there actually that good. what do you think? (if you hate emo poems dont read on)
poem #1 (i havent named the poems so im just going by order)
beneath the moon white bathed in its light stands a man more a beast whose self now he fights
the hunt that was won had come at a price the wolf that they fought now corrupts the mans sight
as the people awaken they see their plight and what they dont understand the kill in fright
after the change his mind anew he sees the threat of these people few
as he flees the wolf minds might tells him why be hunted when he can fight
the time to fight the time to kill give them wounds that will never heal
the time for fang the time for claw time for their death by my maw
the blood, the thrill the people fall for all their knowledge their weak after all
the last one standing his fellows dead his sword in hand the ground ruby red
as i prepare for the kill he charges at me the fear in his eyes so easy to see
as i strike he slashes at me now he knows that he should flee
as i wound him he stabs me we both hit the price to be free
as i die the man now sees what ive done to him what hes done to me
now the hunter sees in his mind that he is now his hunteds kind
as he changes he now has no friends he will be hunted the cycle starts again
Poem #2 the bright green grass the beauty of the plains the blades of life so far unexplained yet where it grows tall wild, untamed it hides that which can cause both fear and pain creatures of land of death that rend small parts of your flesh that cause your end
Poem#3(yeah this was a free verse) the crack of the whip the seering flames the harsh voices of our masters the screams of our agony if this were not hell i would wish for death
poem#4(another wolf poem) as the moon rises so the sun sets on a world that forgets all of natures surprises
during the harsh night a young boy of twelve in darkness he dwells until the end of light
upon the cold beach through the wind and rain he will never think again of those gods he did beseach
through nature ploy its cruel might all through the night turned him more beast then boy
poem#5 The ruby roses the subtle green conceals the danger the blood unseen below the beauty lies only pain the only clues washed away by the rain
poem#6 the autumn world the end of the summer beauty a dead world the fall of the greens the stretch of time the bleak brown even though the sun shines we still wear frowns through this dull world we are not in fright for the coming of winter means a new dead world of white
poem#7 in blackes night the brightest light shines through the trees an endless white
the smallest ant the creatures free the eternal fire the flames to be
behind the light the darkness grows the world of grey the world we know
the trees of metal the forests of steel cause the destruction that can never be healed
yet though the builders black or white they bring destruction and their death brings life
poem#8(this ones a bit less emo) give them life and they bring death give them light and the ruin it give them power and if that they abuse give them poverty and they get in the news
still looking for comments. Sorry for double post but its been ages since anyone posted here and remember that i really need feedback about these poems. I dont care if its criticism or praise but i just need some comments
GAH triple post. Today i found out that at our schools red leaves (a collection of the best poetry done by the whole school) Ive gotten a record as the first person in all 140 years the school has been there for having four poems in there in one year.
White is life And death as well The clouds of heaven Deaths' hound's of hell
Black is darkness What we canot see When the prey hide When the hunter's roam free
Blue is the ocean It's calm and it's rage It's mysterious motion And at night it's rampage
Red is blood As crimson as dawn For those it comes from It is forcibly drawn
Yellow is light The bringer of day The shinging sun And a new today
Orange is fire The greedy flames Who to feed must destroy But all in vain
Green is the balance Nature and it's gale The towering forest's Whose growth we impale
Indigo is order Society and law Whose meaning we destroy And whose warning we ignore
Violet is chaos That comes before the fall Spreading fear and destruction Whose presence cant be ignored
The rainbow is a truce All colours lie there All but black and white Too proud a pair
The broken son
A lonely death A simple thing To draw last breath And hear angels sing
But to live alonde And dide one by one Destroys the soul A broken son
A child lost Left home to fight A war amongst Those whos lifes ingnite
The souls, the hearts OF everyone All those except The broken son
The war grows old Its over fast but its scar Will always last
As he grows old And wars go by He still feels cold He knows he will die
To fight and win But never know You cannot win Against lifes foe
A life lived empty Still torn by war His only friends Shot down by the fours
His life now over He cant have won His fight against death A battle unsung
To fight with death To protect someone Still breaks your soul The broken son
And now the end His life over and done The man pretends That he has won
But a life so empty So un-forfilled Cannot be forever No matter what is killed
And now deceased He has not won Hes lost his life A life broken and done
There ive finally come up with two more poems for this. I know its a quadruple post and im sorry but its going to continue to be that unless other people comment.
They are nice, but could use some punctuation and better structure. Also, you are changing from one type of poetry to another in the same poem, only lines under the other type.
There ive finally come up with two more poems for this. I know its a quadruple post and im sorry but its going to continue to be that unless other people comment.
If noone is commenting then you don't post until someone does comment. A double post is bad, quadruple is very bad. If you keep it up the mods will lock the thread.
