The following is the beggining for a story I'm writing.
The world was grey all around me. Gunfire was the only sound other than the screams of woman and their children, mixed with the men yelling to each other. No doubt more than a hundred had died in the explosion. I had no regrets. These people didn't deserve what lives they had. They were the supporters of The State. I didn't care how many woman and children I had to kill before my mission was accomplished. I was the huntress...I am Artemis.
Erm. Artemis. Goddess of the hunt. Nature lover. I want to know why she is killing everyone, but I am slightly annoyed by the fact she wants to kill the supporters of this 'state'.
Err...yeah...I was going to provide that information in flash backs. Long story short...: Her parents were killed by 'The State' in a bloody revolution in which a psychotic dictator came to power. Now she is out for revenge. She's doing so by destroying pretty much any settlement that supports the Dictator.
Here's the first part after the beggining...
Finally the grey cleared up. I took in the sight around me. Buildings were in ruins, and dead bodies were everywhere. I began to walk out of the town. My mission was done. As I walked, I heard footsteps other than mine. They were rapid...and coming closer. I spun around just in time, drawing my sword and parrying the attacker's blow. I looked around and saw no attacker. I was becoming dilusional...fumes from the flames must have gone to my head. I continued walking, listening closely for any attacker. "You should really rethink your ways." someone said. I looked around, and yet again, no one was there. I stopped and took my gun from it's holster. "Show yourself!" I called out. Then, something hit me. I don't know what, but it was what I imagine getting hit by a train might feel like. The air around me was a bright blue.
Suddenly, I was back in my middle school years. It was Christmas, and father had just handed me a card from him and mom. Just as I opened it, the house seemed to explode. Soldiers hurried into the house, shooting everything that moved. I did the only thing I could. I ran.
I snapped back to reality. I was laying on the ground, sprawled in an akward position. There was someone standing over me. "Well..." I boy's voice said, "What have we here?"
sorry but i must agree with kyouzou on this one. let's wait and see how the story advances and then maybe we'll see how the plot differs. keep writing! don't let the trolls getcha down! not that ummm kyouzous a troll of course. *cough cough* *nervous jitter* ahem.. i'll just leave now....
XD i didn't think about that one. and V for vendetta is amazing.... But yeah, the second update sound waaayyy too much like VFV. but if you veered a bit off from the second post, it would be pretty cool to read.
I've never even heard of the 'V for Vendetta' thing. Meh. Here we go!
[i]I quickly jumped up, shooting at the guy. He didn't seem to take notice as the bullets flew past him. He drew a Cougar Magnum from his holster and aimed at my head. "I don't want any trouble." he said sternly, "But I was sort of wondering...why all the mayhem?" "None of your business." I said venomously. He began to back away from me, still aiming at me. "Run away!" someone yelled. Suddenly, the guy was tackled. "Get off me Rhemus!" he yelled angrily. "But there are like...200 soldiers back there!" 'Rhemus' said. "It doesn't matter!" the other one snapped, "We stopped a nuke, we can handle some soldiers." Rhemus shot a look at me, a funny look on his face. Then, the other guy used some sort of smoke bomb. Then, they were gone.
I spent a few minutes, trying to comprehend what had just happened. I heard a huge explosion to the north, and saw what looked like a Chinook helicopter on steroids hovering in over the site. It was shooting at the soldiers...maybe they could help me. They certainly seemed well equipped.
As I neared the place where the explosion occured, I began sticking to the shadows, hoping to stay as hidden as possible. I peered around a corner and saw absolute mayhem. Several young men and women were picking off the soldiers, without even breaking a sweat. "Hit the deck!" someone yelled, just as the helicopter opened fire on the soldiers with a massive rocket launcher. "Take no prisoners!" someone yelled. I looked towards the voice and saw the two guys from before shouldering assault rifles and walking casually towards the fallen soldiers. The helicopter had landed, and a little boy and young woman were hurrying towards an injured member of their force. This was definitely an organized attack...but who were these guys? "I know you're there!" the guy who had attacked me called in my direction, not even turning around. His team-mates looked at each other and towards my hiding spot. I took a deep breath and walked out.
Meh. Yeah, theres a description of her coming soon. I'm still working out some of the details about the charecters. But for now, just go with this (I haven't put it into story form yet).
She has black hair that goes down to the waist, dark blue eyes, and has a striped tattoo on her back. She most often wears a tube top and black jeans.
She's inspired by my sister. I'm trying to think of the rest of the next part. I got as far as Part 2, then procrastinated, then started, then got writers block...so yeah...
