i have never writen a story so i hope you like it plz leave your comments =) ( i am gonna hopefully turn it into a full fledged novel)
ok here it goes I was an avarage kid,not really taller or shorter than anyone else in my grade.i was about 5'4" thats normal for 8th grade. My parents wernt anything really safisticated nothing mutch my dad was a simple technition for a electricity compony and my mom was a sceintist for a strange government that was makeing something... something... important. LAtely mom hasnt been talking much and we have starting to been going to a few funerals of my moms co-workers. 12 in the last 2 and a halve months.That is how life went for a littl while long before mom went completely phsyco she starts rambeling about soemthing she calls, the sickness and how it excaped.The milatary came and took her away. I never saw her again. The milatary where a co-orperation called the indigo guard. They where just recently developed. For what reason. The next few years had been fairly simple and normal i went thru high school and this is where i am right now. The day after i graduate i get a phanphlet in the mail its from the indego guard. They want me to sigh up to stop the recent zombie outbrake.i have no idea what they mean. ill go just to get info. Just info.
and thats how it starts, kinda slow but i got the idea in a dream and i know exactaly where it will go.
It is quite alright for an intro. A short summary of the past and the background of the character. However, now I will be wondering 1. What is so important that the character is short? 2. How is being a technician and a scientist for a strange government not satisfying? 3. What is this strange government, that apparently isn't the government of the country?
Above questions are good, if they end up being answered in the following of the story, if they are not, it will irritate the reader. Conclusively, as this being the intro, it is the more important.
It is alright, just work on your spelling and that. I would understand if you were in a rush And It has me interested, but not as much as I would be if there was a little more detail, maybe a little more 'fun' with it. It kinda makes me depressed
Lol, methinks 12 funerals in a period of 2 1/2 months would make people suspicious no? I would tell you to work on your spelling and grammar but it's already been done. But I do suggest you slow down a little, it was alright for the intro, but later on the story needs to progress more slowly.
Don't hold your breath on getting published. Some stories may be amazing, but because they aren't 'in' no publisher is gonna want it to be one of their products. Don't lose the love of writing by tring to become noticed. It happens sometimes, and it is sad because the authors books, they just... Change. They don't hold the same 'feel' for it that they had before. If this is a Zombie Book, yeah some people might want to publish it. But it will take a while for you to gain popularity.
Twilight was out for 4 years before it became popular. I had to wait each year for a book to come out because I read them when they first got published. (Also, if anyone has read twilight and you sorta like Stephanie's style of writing, Check out The Host. IT IS AMAZING. also written by her) anyways, don't get all hyped up in hopes for publication. It takes a lonnnnnnnggggg time. you will probably be 15 before it gets published. and that is IF you finish it while you are 13.
But don't let my pessimistic side get you down. If you really want to, Go for it.
