I have the beginning of a story that I may create. Give me feedback or ideas on anything but spelling
Overlord: The Defenders' Story The alarms were screeching in my ear. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. "Klaus! The machine gun! SCHNELL! Quickly!" "The guns! Give targets to the Coastal Guns!" "HEINRICH!" I was ordered "Get to your post. The day has finally come." The allies had gone against all of our expectations. The amount of sheer firepower raining down on the beach from the Allied naval ships and soldiers below far exceeded anything we had seen before. The weather was not the typical sunny, dry weather they normally landed in. Their paratroopers had not been used in such large numbers since the attack on Sicily. But, despite this I knew I must fight for the Riech. I grabbed the gun tightly and pulled the trigger. I thought the Americans landing on the beach must be insane. The noise must have been deafening, as we had to yell to have a simple conversation. The hails of bullets and shells must have been a horror, and to trek onward, that is true bravery...
Quite good. I'd recommend moving the main character's order to the top, to give the story more direction. By putting another's first, it diverts the attention away from the main character. So just flip the "Klaus" line with the "Heinrich" line.
