I liked frankensteins story and i made one too it is not copying off him in anyway.It is not going to be a bad story like my other ones.And all characters used are being used with permission.
The legend Of AG Prologue Once upon a time there was a land, A land founded by the first men on earth. They eventually built a thriving city and since then they have evolved much but another land that was bent on world domination its name was Miniclip yes they were founded by Eskimos who had no creativity but weaponry and siege machines they have already gotten kongregate on their knees their only real threat wasArmorgames whose power and wisdome was vast but one day Miniclip gave the order to siege AG their troops outnumbered them and their machines tore down our walls AG defended itself the best it could but despite their best efforts under leader Bigjacob they were defeated and so AG is now in a dark hour.Will a hero rise no one knows.
Chapter 1 The rise of a hero.
âPeople fled to New grounds, my even parernts left we should have tried harder.âSays Slayer Shadow to his friend Brian266.âThey left when I was only 9 I was raised by the wolves aint many still in AG no one but you me and the wolvesâ. Brian nodded his head and took a bite out of a nut ,Brian happended to be a chipmunk who Slayer trianed to be able to combat enemies such as miniclip soldiers who tried to colonize AG but Slayer knew that if they build cities here this land will become another part of miniclips vast nation of lands such as Kongregate crazy monkey games and much others that were so pathetic they were named things like Freegames and 1000s of games.Slayer left his cave with brian And remembered what the last soldier who tried to colonize here had told him right before he died,âYour efforts are a waste of time boy Miniclip will soon be using their new weaponry that is cabable of wiping out entire lands Including your wasteland you call home pathetic boyâThen the man had coughed a lot and finally fell to the ground.Slayer knew that he had to stop this before it happened so He decided to set out And defeat the evil Miniclip king Myspace1111.So Slayer set out with his sidekick and set his mind on getting to Miniclips citadel He grabbed his few belongings And stuffed them in his bag.Slayer knew it would be difficult but he didnât care he had to save his home.And off he went to face a power that was stronger than he could imagine.
I felt it would have been better if you had not used names such as Miniclip etc, caused it made it sound kind of....synthetic and like an imitation, sorry for the harsh words. Would have been better if the dialogue was just the dialogue, without the 'he says' added in, to make it sound more professional. Also, try to split the sentences up into different clauses and parts instead of concentrating them into a gigantic paragraph. It makes the narratorâs voice sound breathless at the end of reading, if that made any sense.
Oh and one more thing, if you typed on Microsoft Word and some other programs then c/p it onto AG, funny symbols appear.
Slayer had been traveling for about 5 hours when he saw a Inn.He decided to go in.Once he was inside he saw a Person who looked like he had just been terrified.Slayer said âWhats wrong with youâ?The man seem to have heard him so he said âum sorry I thought I saw A werewolf.âSlayer laughed âFoolish man there are no such thing as werewolvesâBut the man Said âI knew I saw it and if you lagh one more time Im raising the price for your stay By 10 coinsâWoah Woah calm down old man Now get me a mug of coffee for a this teenager whos trying to save his homelandââFine muttered the manâMy names nobler Im the proud owner of this innâYou know any adventurers that would be willing to help meâ?Um lets see theres Mxracer100 no not that one hmm Oh I just thought of a good one His name is RightWWrong.âYoull find him in The town ahead .âThanks for the informationâ.Slayer took a sip of coffee and saidâwhat does this guy look like?âWell he has blond hair 18 years old and about5 feet tallâ.âOkâsaid Slayer.Then Slayer left the Inn.And started going down the road but after about 30 minutes a shadow creeped up on him slowly then Slayer turned around and saw a wolf.The wolf jumped at him but slayer cut his head with his longsword.hoooooooooooowâyelled the wolf and then it ran away.Then slayer continued to the town.But he knew he had to fight a army of mutants that were camped in between the inn and the town.He went forward to fullfill is destiny.
Im going to try to put in this Chapter2.5 Myspaces order.
Myspace the evil king of Miniclip.Had been yelling at his builders to work faster on the weapon that had the ability to launch several zombie containers.He had made his scientists turn 1000s of peasants into zombies and once thee weapon was complete it would have the ability to to shoot100s of zombies containers,the containers when getting huge damage from landing so far away would explode relaeasing all of the zombies.Now myspace was thinking about how far away he would need to launch the weapon when a messnger came into this throne room."Sir or spies have reported A teenage boy who bears hte resemblance of AGers coming this way ".So one teeneager cannot stop my legions of men and wizards.Very well sir:Then the messenger hurried out of the room.But truly the king was worried."What if the boy is the boy in the prphecy the one who was born with the ability to fight like a immortal.Hmm.if he made it here this is ruined". i will sleep on it he thought.He went fast asleep.
So thats sprt of a midway point telling what happened as soon as the boy started to leave the inn.
Ok, this story is good. Love my character. Can I add one small part if you don't mind. I should get a legendary sword that only I can weild. That's it. I think the legendary sword would be a cool touch to the story. Oh I like the story so far. It is amazing man.
Slayer had been going through the woods when he finally reached mutants hill it looked abandoned,but he was not fooled Slayer continued cautiously when he noticed he had been stepping in green goo."What is...He was cutoff for a green blob grabbed him he sliced it with his sword and all of a sudden green monsters rise everywhere they moved like a robot very slowly Slayer slashed them all but they reformed and contuined their march when The biggest came out of a large pile of goo he roaredMe covertcoder you food".Slayer jumped up And hit is head with his fists but he grabbed him and put him in is his mouth.slayer wondering how he got in here looked around And sawsome glowing sword it was huge.Slayer grabbbed it and sliced open the monsters stomach and stepped out the monster got angry but slayer jumped and cut his heart.The monster fell down heavily and after observing our hero continued through the giant hill.What will happen next??????????????Next chapter
Slayer had been making his way through A long path and finally came across a wall.It appeared to be very instable then some guards came over to inspect him.A guard says " where are you from"."I um am from Crazy monkey games land". "You sound like your from AG boy"My bloodline is AG and uh"Slayer regretted what he did next.He grabbed his sword and sliced the guards heads off.A vilager whosaw the incident Went to to tell a guard so Slayer decied he would have to fight his way through this city.Slayer entered the city and quickly caused chaos he left buildings burning people screaming.Guards in rage.Meanwhile
"Sir theres a maniac in the city"."What exclaimed the king wel i have a plan quickly tell The captain Mxracer100 to get his soldiers escorting the citizens here NOW!!""Yes sir"The man told The captain King myspaces orders."Hmm ok" soon he had gotten the remaining 40 percent of the population in the palace.Mxracer100 reported to the king we got all the people we could find in the castle sir what do we do next"?"We launch our zombie containers at him"WHAT SIR i mean sir they would plague the city"Watch the tone and they wont if we set them to destroying a certain target""Tell the machinists to launch the containers at him"Yes sir said Mxracer100.Within mintues the zombie containers were flying in the air.
What is happening shouted Slayer as zobies started falling all around him.
Will slayer survive see next time on The legend of AG.
Slayer found himself sourrounded by hordes of weird undead beasts so he told brian to go duck for cover.Brian noddedand ran into a mouse hole and got welcomed by a black mouse.Slayer thinking of what to do saw a dam nearby and then located the gate opener so Slayer tried to get there but was stopped by a abomination he quickly sliced at is legs and the abomination yelled"Gimme your life"."Never yelled Slayer has he jumped and stuck the sword In the abominations throat."Take that".He then found himself as he proceded to the gate opener that zombies were coming at him from all sides saying "BRRRAAAAAAINNNNNNSS".Slayer punched and kicked yelling"get a life."And youre in for it now".After having barely dodged a zombies bite he quickly destroyed the rest and made it to the opener.As he pressed the button It would take 1 minute for it toactivate releasing the water looding the enemy city.But he would have to make his way up to The palace which had a wall that should be able to prevent the water from getting to him.He quickly hurried and got Brian and put him in his pocket.Slayer then hurried fast to the wall to open the door (which was unguarded at the momnet so the soldiers could escpae to the safety of The castle.Slayer was almost to the door when several gargoyles stopped him They grabbed him and brought him in the air when brian came out of the pocket and bit The monsters so they let go of Slayer who landed in a bush.The wall had started to open.Slayer said "We got to hurry". He opened the door and quickly closed and locked it.Phew Slayer thought The water flowed past the castle but couldnit breach it.So slayer saw a rope nearby and quickly attacheda hook to it.He grabbed the rope threw it to the open window.and started to climb up.
Will slayer be able to defeat the wrath of the towns soldiers can he defeat theking will he be able to solve the mystery of his parnets where abouts find out next time.On the legend of AG.
Slayer had been walking in the castle until he saw the biggest Door."That has to be the the throne room.said slayer. He opened the door and saw Myspace."very well boy you have made it this far"He got up and grabbed his sword.He slings it at slayer but he counters it.Then while being stunned from the counter myspace says WHO LIKES HAPPY ENDINGS AND CUTS OFF SLAYERS HEAD.Well thats the end of that.But sir said a servent now theres no real ending."so""just eat donut"
