ForumsArt, Music, and WritingThe Sweet Escape!

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Nomad

I only wrote one section of this story for you guys to figure out what happened before and what might happen after.



Jimmyâs Section

I walk slowly crunched over tending to my hurt arm. I find my dreadful family with three other strangers setting up a camp for the night. I tell my mom that I hurt my arm when the boat crashed. Of course she was very worried and found a first aid kit and carefully wrapped the soft bandage around the cuts and bruises. After my mom bandaged my arm up she said that I should have something to eat so then I have energy for the rest of the night. She found a couple of bananas and I gladly ate them. I was feeling very tired so I found myself a blanket and fell asleep warm and thinking of how we were going to get off this spooky island. I woke up to the chatter of my dad and a stranger talking about weapons. The stranger had said that he was going on a hunting trip but since the boat has crashed he thought they could use the guns to kill some animals and get enough food to last them for a day or two. My dad had agreed that this was a good idea and he was going out with two other strangers after breakfast to get some food. I got out of bed very gently trying not to hit my arm even though it was almost better. I then walked to the tree that had fallen down and we use the flat side as a table. I was served half a coconut with its smooth tasty coconut milk inside of it. I also ate some berries and plants that one of the strangers found with my mom. I saw that my dad and the strangers were going out now to hunt animals. I wondered where they would go to find game so I stealthily crept away from my mother and brother to follow them. I made sure to keep my distance away from them so then they would not know they were being followed.

They suddenly stopped and crouched low with their rifles at the ready. I saw a whole herd of deer grazing in the meadow just a few yards ahead of where we stopped. The three of them aimed their rifles at the hearts of three different deer to increase the chance of killing one. On the count of three they shot, my dad hit one just below the chest and it ran away stumbling. The stranger that was the expert at hunting hit the deer square in the heart, it staggered a little then fell to the ground with a thump. The other stranger missed the deer completely and the herd went bounding off in the distance. The deer that got killed was a full grown male and I realized that it would feed all the people tonight. I went into a deep thought of how being stranded on this island might not be so bad after all. Then all of a sudden I heard a tremendous scream of terror and I dashed to see what had happened. Thoughts were going through my head as I ran through the forest, did they kill another deer? Did one of them get hurt? Did they run into savages? Then I saw my father hunched over the stranger, who could not aim a rifle and I saw a pool of blood underneath him. My dad had wild eyes and was babbling on about how the other stranger pushed him off the cliff and that he ran off into the dense terrain. I didnât know if I should trust my dad because of the barbaric look on his face, but I guess he is my dad and I should.

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44Flames
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44Flames
585 posts
Nomad

Thanks for the help I will try to get another up and this time without crazy letters

44Flames
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Nomad

We had just moved into our large, new house in Mississauga, Ontario, in an area called Winston Churchill. My parents, my four other sisters, my brother and I were unpacking our stuff in our new bedrooms. We had just finished and were talking to each other about leaving our old schools and friends behind. My mother called us to do chores, starting now! I was really tired since it was 10:30pm in the night, and we had to do chores now? It seemed to take forever, but when I was done, I decided to go to my bedroom and get some sleep.
I heard what sounded like footsteps in the upstairs hallway. Thinking it was my brother or sister, I got up to shout at them for bothering me while I was sleeping, but there was no one there. I rushed downstairs in the basement where my parents, sister and brother were considerately working. I asked them all if they had been upstairs and they replied NO! Now I was getting pretty freaked out, but I decided it was just my imagination and shrugged it of, as if it never happened.
I went back to my bed, which was now freezing cold. I took hold of a sweater, put it on, and got back in. I woke up in the middle of the night, around 12:30am, after everyone had gone to sleep. I heard this loud, banging sound that seemed to be coming from my parents bedroom door. I thought it might be my brother or sister wanting to get a drink of water, but too scared to go alone. I was wrong.
The banging continued, getting louder by the minute, I could not get to sleep so I decided to check it out. I walked into the hallway and believe me, there was no one there. As soon as I walked in, the banging seemed to stop. I stared at the door only for a quick moment before deciding to go back to bed. After a couple of minutes the banging started again. Now, I was totally chilled to my very last bone!
I tried to sleep again but I could not, very typical for me. I was awake the whole night. In the morning, I rushed to my parents bedroom and thrust the door open, noticing that the door was freezing! I laid down beside my mom, who also appeared as if she hadn't slept in a really long time.
I told her about my experience, and she said that she could hear the banging too, since it was on her bedroom door! She explained to me how she was really scared and told my dad to see what it was, but he was very sleepy and shrugged it off as the wind being extremely loud.
Years will pass, but I know that I will never forget that chilling Monday night in November, 2004.

44Flames
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Nomad

What do you guys think? What type of story should I do?

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