I haven't been a major part of the writing community here in a while, and I kinda liked being a major part of the writing community here. So, I'm making another thread. Imma start with a pedantic and verbose poem I wrote about an odd tree in my front yard.
Half-green phantasm, still corporeal -
Snagged on transition for time immemorial.
Uroboric life, it's stuck on the stomach,
Lack of senescence rules, it sits dictatorial.
It stands through summer, winter and fall -
The leaves hold on, vicious winds withal.
But how can the zombie tree survive,
if nature gives no help at all?
Suppose it's luck, agonizingly poetic -
Figure it's love, a deceiving aesthetic.
But can love for life keep it alive forever,
as it stands against nature, unsympathetic?
Come to think of it, a lot of the AG writing youngsters were never exposed to a lot of my work. Hrm, how times have changed *rubs achey back with trusty cane*
Lack of stanzas, how you torture me. This officially teaches me to never c/p directly from my dA evar again.
Half-green phantasm, still corporeal - Snagged on transition for time immemorial. Uroboric life, it's stuck on the stomach, Lack of senescence rules, it sits dictatorial.
It stands through summer, winter and fall - The leaves hold on, vicious winds withal. But how can the zombie tree survive, if nature gives no help at all?
Suppose it's luck, agonizingly poetic - Figure it's love, a deceiving aesthetic. But can love for life keep it alive forever, as it stands against nature, unsympathetic?
Come to think of it, a lot of the AG writing youngsters were never exposed to a lot of my work. Hrm, how times have changed *rubs achey back with trusty cane*
Truth be told, I was a wee laddie here at ArmorGames when you were still kickin' here in the AMW. Nice to see some more of your work Alt--I especially like your tree poem at the top--keep it up!
What is it that ticks like a drum machine In the darkest recesses of humanity's heart Ladles injustice from filigreed tureen Complains about its world being pulled apart?
Perhaps it's pinpointable if the mind is used For scalpel or forceps yield no results Perhaps it's redeemable if left unenthused A force that runs rampant in modern adults
Encouraged discomfort to turn the gears Keep them oiled, running fine But it serves to only grind the ears Make escapees dejected, saturnine
The need to be annoyed is annoying me while it continues to spread like a plague don't worry, I acknowledge the hypocrisy but if I keep complaining, it may well abate!
Yes, this is sloppy and the arc of elucidation is very sudden if semi-intentional. I wrote this in a 5-10-minute oneshot here just a second ago, so it isn't polished. As per usual, I will revise based on feedback from others as I cannot critique myself. So now I am forcing you to reply! My dastardly plan revealed!
Truth be told, I was a wee laddie here at ArmorGames when you were still kickin' here in the AMW. Nice to see some more of your work Alt--I especially like your tree poem at the top--keep it up!
:t Praise is my narcotic of choice.
So yes . . . isn't it reassuring to know that at the very least I was accepted as poetry contest judge for a reason? :3
My writing is all very unpolished though, because I always upload/post the rough drafts right after I finish them and revise according to critique. Same goes with that one. Imma revise it based on the criticisms I get.
Oh so you DO write! Mr. I'm So Fantastic I'm Going to Hide It All Away.
Truth be told, I go through phases where I write a ton and then am blocked severely for a period of time, and I'm currently at the point where I'm re-establishing myself after the kick to the face that is NaNoWriMo, Week Two knocked me off a cliff. So yes, I do write, it's just that I haven't been very much until recently ^_^
also idk your writing appealed to me earlier (in the year). but you do a lot of telling. and little showing. :s i guess more romantic era writing. with all the derps
also idk your writing appealed to me earlier (in the year). but you do a lot of telling. and little showing. :s i guess more romantic era writing. with all the derps
I've moved to doing a lot of showing in my prose, but my poetry is very tell-y, yes. I've been trying to correct that for a while D:
Meh, I'm not too happy with what I've been writing lately. To be honest though, I'm not happy with anything I write so I guess it isn't too much of a change >_>
Imma write a story. I haven't written any of my crappy, pretentious short stories that I love so much in a long time.
I would c/p it, but I like the italics and I dun wanna redo them here. Notice the lack of attention to sentence structure, correctness, or good writing.
the title to this thread is very deceptive... you claimed to be alt when your name very clearly states you are not!!! your trickery and cunning have been dually noted. I am intrigued... i think i may just read a story or two
I think that the typo at the end could have been purposeful. You could have created the world wherein the protagonist is remembering his life in the third person. As he slips into death, his brain functions become sillier. Maybe not.
You seemed to only partially explore the idea of the internal monologue. I enjoyed the first part but it didn't get reflect the depth that one can achieve with their illogical/mindless assumptions. If you know what I mean...
